Madeline DeFrees - The Family Group

For this first blog post, I wanted to reach back to my roots. Like me, Madeline DeFrees was born in Oregon and later moved to Washington. That's probably where most of the similarities stop. She was born in 1919 and later became a nun with The Sisters of the Holy Names of Jesus and Mary. She received her BA from Marylhurst College and her MA from the University of Oregon, and later taught at the University of Montana and the University of Massachusetts, among several other schools. She is, as of this writing, retired in Seattle. She wrote frequently about convent life, publishing two books and several poems.

Her poem, "The Family Group," takes place on a day at the zoo. She seems to be wrestling a bit with her choice to become a nun, perhaps accompanied by another nun. I would by lying if I told you I completely understood this poem, but I think part of the beauty of it is in its ambiguity.

The Family Group

That Sunday at the zoo I understood the child I
never had would look like this: stiff-fingered
spastic hands, a steady drool, and eyes in cages
with a danger sign. I felt like stone myself
the ancient line curved inward in a sunblind
stare. My eyes were flat. Flat eyes for tanned
young couples with their picture-story kids. Heads

turned our way but you’d learned not to care. You
stood tall as Greek columns, weather-streaked
face bent toward the boy. I wanted to take his hand,
hallucinate a husband. He whimpered at my touch.
You watched me move away and grabbed my other
hand as much in love as pity for our land-locked
town. I heard the visionary rumor of the sea. What

holds the three of us together in my mind is something
no one planned. The chiseled look of mutes.
A window shut to keep out pain. Wooden blank of doors.
That stance the mallet might surprise
if it could strike the words we hoard for fears
galloping at night over moors through convoluted bone.
The strange uncertain rumor of the sea.